My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
