I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
