have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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