Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
