What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
