If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
