i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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