Walk of Shame. In a state park.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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