I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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