my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
