I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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