New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
