i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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