New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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