This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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