So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
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he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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