Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
