I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON