I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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