I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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