Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
