Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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