Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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