I wish i was in the wii world.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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