ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Randomize
