I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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