You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
