You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
