he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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