I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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