if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
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