Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
smell my finger.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
