I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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