I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
