my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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