After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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