You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
