I heard we made out
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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