So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
