my mouth tastes like poor choices
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
