You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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