What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
