We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
