Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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