You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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