dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
