What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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