I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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