Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Did you pee in the oven last night??
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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