He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
